Archive for the 'Humor' Category

Retro Scan of the Week: “Soft Wear Versus Hard Wear”

Monday, June 12th, 2006
Dan Bricklin Shoes Ad

Move over, Michael Jordan. Dan Bricklin, co-inventor of the PC’s original killer app, VisiCalc, has something to say about shoes. And he’s afraid somebody might steal them.

[ Scanned from Time Magazine, September 26th, 1988 ]

If you use this image in a blog post, please support “Retro Scan of the Week” by giving us obvious credit for the original scan and entry. Thanks.

[Update: 07/21/2011: I asked Dan Bricklin on Twitter how this shoe endorsement deal came about. Did they approach him? His answer: “The ad agency needed a software person, saw a photo of me in the Boston Herald and knew my work and called.” He also mentioned that, in addition to Time, the shoe ad ran in Sports Illustrated, and a similar ad ran in the Men’s section of the New York Times. ]

This Week’s Game Ads A-Go-Go: “Out-Of-Context Game Ad Illustration Face Quiz”

Thursday, June 8th, 2006
Face Quiz

This week on Game Ads A-Go-Go, I’ve cooked up a little quiz using out-of-context snippets from classic game ads. Take the quiz, and see how well you do!

Retro Scan of the Week: Bill Cosby and the TI-99/4A

Monday, June 5th, 2006
Bill Cosby TI-99/4A Ad

Upon looking at this ad, I find myself wondering if Bill Cosby ever actually used a TI-99/4A. No, wait…has he ever owned one? Was it a gift from Texas Instruments for being their spokesman? Does he still have one sitting in his closet/attic/basement somewhere, or did he yard sale it in ’89? Did he ever turn it on? Did Bill Cosby ever write a BASIC program? Did he ever balance his budget with Household Budget Management? Did he play Munch Man or Alpiner? Did he curse the TI-99/4A joysticks for being terrible and throw them against the wall when he lost?

If you prick Bill Cosby, does he not bleed JELLO?

If you use this image in a blog post, please support “Retro Scan of the Week” by giving us obvious credit for the original scan and entry. Thanks.

Lessons from the Master: The Zen of Enduro Racer

Thursday, June 1st, 2006

Enduro RacerMy absolute favorite Sega Master System game is Enduro Racer. It’s based on a Sega arcade title of the same name, but the play style is completely different. Instead of the “behind the rider” view of the arcade, you get a 2/3 overhead view of the action. The coolest thing about the SMS version Enduro Racer are the bike upgrades — there’s something really satisfying about souping up your motorcycle with an improved “suspension” and watching it soar over the strategically placed ramps on the course. And who can forget “engine,” which makes your bike run so fast that it can be hard for your brain and fingers to keep up (Note: if you get that upgrade you should avoid the ramps). Sega Control StickI always play the game with the Sega Control Stick, which I feel makes quick maneuvering around obstacles easier. It also somehow adds to the motorcycle feel of the game. That’s about the only time my Sega Control Stick ever gets used.

The biggest bummer regarding Enduro Racer is the fact that there are only five tracks. In the course of the game, you play the tracks twice: once with only one opponent (a car or another motorcycle), and again with two opponents at a time. But when it’s all over, there’s quite a surprise treat at the end. Think of it as a little philosophy, Enduro Racer-style. Let’s take a look at what happens when the credits roll.

[ Continue reading Lessons from the Master: The Zen of Enduro Racer » ]

Retro Scan of the Week: “Authentic Sega Gear”

Monday, May 29th, 2006
Authentic Sega Gear

This entertaining scan is from a fold-out catalog poster that came with many Sega Genesis games in the mid-1990s. My favorite items are the “2 Dudes with Atti2udes” t-shirt and the sleeveless Sonic & Knuckles denim jacket. Real classy stuff.

Dude — I’ve not seen this much attitude in years.

If you use this image in a blog post, please support “Retro Scan of the Week” by giving us obvious credit for the original scan and entry. Thanks.

This Week’s Game Ads A-Go-Go: Visual Hyperbole

Thursday, May 25th, 2006
Visual Hyperbole

This is just a friendly reminder that this week’s Game Ads A-Go-Go on GameSetWatch is dedicated to visual hyperbole in game ads. Check it out now, funk soul brother.

Retro Scan of the Week: “How to Make Your Computer Even More Boring”

Monday, May 22nd, 2006
Boring Computer

Sounds awesome! Where do I sign up?

No, this is not a Photoshop job. Midwest Scientific Instruments really wanted to make your computer more boring, presumably by making you have to do less work to load a program into system memory. If this is the standard of “boring,” then I suppose my current computer is about 2000% more boring than the average computer in 1977. In fact, according to Moore’s Law of Boredom, this trend should continue well into the future. Moore famously postulated in 1968 that the Integral Boredom Factor (IBF) of computing devices will double every 12-24 months. So far his postulate has impressively held true. Only time will tell if bloated software companies such as Microsoft can complicate things enough to reverse the trend.

[Scanned by VC&G from Byte Magazine, February 1977]

If you use this image in a blog post, please support “Retro Scan of the Week” by giving us obvious credit for the original scan and entry. Thanks.

This Week’s Game Ads A-Go-Go: Bad Game Ad Puns

Thursday, May 11th, 2006
Rune Your Day

This week’s Game Ads A-Go-Go on GameSetWatch is dedicated to bad video game advertisement puns.

Ach! Back to moving.

Retro Scan of the Week: “Permanent Video Game Instructions”

Monday, May 8th, 2006
Permastruct

Wow — these instructions are so permanent that they have outlived the rugged plastic case they were grafted onto! The instructions in question are actually stuck like a sticker on the flip side of the piece you see here. I bet if a set of Permastruct (TM) instructions got caught in a nuclear blast, you’d inspect the site later to find only a smoldering pile of radioactive gravel and, of course, a concise guide on how to play Bionic Commando.

Of particular note is the presumed Permastruct (TM) mascot– we’ll call him Permaman — with his back to the camera, throwing an awkward, off-balance punch at absolutely nothing while shouting vague sardonic threats at the Permastruct (TM) logo. Tony the Tiger would get committed if found pulling a similar stunt on a box of Frosted Flakes. But then again, Tony’s not permanent. Permaman ain’t gotta take no crap from nobody.

Retro Scan of the Week: “10 Megabyte Hard Disk: $3,495”

Monday, May 1st, 2006
NES Power Glove Manual

Before you get excited about the low, low price for ~10,000,000 bytes of random-access magnetic data storage, make sure you read the fine print. Turns out the $3,495 price is for a refurbished unit only. The new 10 megabyte hard disk retails for a whopping $4,495. Oh, and there’s another catch: the price is in 1980 dollars (US). Adjusted to 2005 dollars, that comes to around $11,415.77. Ouch.

And this isn’t one of your 3.5″, half-height 5 1/4″ or even full-height 5 1/4″ hard drives either. No; it’s a hulking, old-school, non-Winchester jobbie that takes interchangeable disk cartridges.

I want one.